gosh! can you believe it? i repeat-today is the last day of 2008. it's like a blink of an eye and suddenly we are nearing the end. tomrrow is going to be a new year. a new beginning. whether we realise it or not a year has pass and most of us must be wondering what have we done or achieved or contribute or gain or whatever to whatever issues or target or objectives or goals that has been set or focused on or prioritised or.. something like that, this whole year. so the verdict? bad, very bad, worst, ok, good, very good, excellent? or maybe not so sure? it's in your hand. you decide.
so how about me? how does my life fare this year?
well.. truthfuly, this is the year that i really wouldn't want to remember. the year that i really want to forget. 2008 promises a new beginning, a new chapter. and indeed it was. but in a different kind of way and a different kind of twist. infact it was so twisted i became entangled in it. badly.
this is the year of mourning. i mourned a lot. i mean a lot! well i guess the effect you'll get when in shock. i mourned, i grief, i question a few things etc etc.. i'm getting mad aka crazy! :-) i could turn into the hulk. hehe.. luckily i managed to control my heartbeat thus preventing myself turning into a green-like monster. scary..
"Ada yang Hilang-Ipang"
i lost something this year. you might say "dude normal la tuh. everybody lost something somewhere. A lost his cat, B lost her earring, C got lost in the jungle and so on". i know but this year is especially stand out from the rest because the things i'd lost are the one that i cherish the most. that i loved the most. one of it was my scooter. i'm quite baffle myself as to why THIS year i lost quite a number or things that was dearest to me? one thing lead to another. coincidence or just plain bad luck only God knows. when you thought things were bad enough, it became very bad, then worst and then worst-er. God.. it totally drained you untill you were completly felt dejected an out of bound. i was walking on a very thin line of thread. there were no sunny days. the rain stop occasionally but the skies never opened up. it realy smacked you hard in the face.. or maybe the groin area.
at the same time i learned a lot this year. in work and in life. in work because i got a new job. in life because of the mourning-grieving-and-questioning thing. there were lessons learned. one thing that i learned was that we should never take things for granted. anything. friends, family, partners or even your enemy. i regreted a lot of things that i have ever did in my life. oh how i wish i could take it all back..
"Trying To find My Way-Lifehouse"
untill now i'm still searching on what is still left of me or for me. i'm still trying to find my way out. is it left or right? north or south? i'm not sure. haven't make up my mind yet. or maybe i'm not up to it yet.
"Seperti Yang Dulu-Ungu"
apa azam tahun depan?
who? me?
same as this year kot. none. hehe.. actually i have one but it didn't materialised. maybe i'll try again this year. so what do i hope for? well, i wish that 2009 will be at least for the better if not the best. i pray for the best. like everyone else i pray next year things would turn my way. i endured a lot this year so i really need it. i crave for it! i hope there is a silver lining somewhere for me.
last but not least, i would like to take this opportunity to wish all the people in this world a very Happy New Year 2009. may all of your dreams or what you had wish for comes true and i hope that next year will bring joy to all of you.
Amin.