Selamat Hari Jadi Kak Har!

today i would like to wish my sis haryani a very happy birthday!

thanks for everything. you help me in so many ways that i couldn't possible repay it back. you sacrifice so much and i'm so lucky to have you as my sister and i'm proud to be your brother.

i wish you all the very best in life. through thick and thin i will always be there for you. love you sis.

Ronda-ronda Luar Kotaraya

yesterday din "the cikgu" called me and asked me to accompany him to kajang to survey his wedding invitation card. so we went to a place, kind of like a bus terminal but they have shop lots above it.

seems that we were one hour late when we arrived. so then we went sight seeing to bangi. not to the centre of bangi but just to a shopping complex not far from the bus terminal.. hehe..

i never went there so, don't mind to just wonder around places i haven't been to. lepak at a mamak where the roti nan was not good and the nescafe ais was bad. not recommended.

then suddenly i said " jom gi putrajaya?". din looked at me one kind then he said "ok lah". so we went.

don't really remember when was the last time i went there. for me it was a beautiful and modern place. some people might beg to differ but who cares.

[click picture to enlarge]

first time went praying inside the putrajaya mosque. very beautiful mosque inside out. some renovation ongoing so a bit dusty. but what a magnificent architecture.

it was weekend so a lot of people around, just having a stroll or lepak-lepak with family members, couples, friends. some buses with out of town tourist etc etc..

jealousy creep a bit seeing them having fun. wish that i could be like them someday.

Selamat Hari Jadi Amizuraida

yes.. i still remember. how could i forget. i mean, who in the God d**n world can forget. two days later after your 28th, you finally uttered the magic word.

who could blame you. it's in the stars.

anyway, past aside.. on this special day, i want to wish you a happy birthday.

i wish you all the happiness life can give you. dipanjangkan umur dan dimurahkan rezeki. and also i wish you all the best for your future undertakings. i always pray that you will pass with flying colours and finally grasp the scroll that you have always dream of.

i know you will make your family proud. because i know you are one smart and hardworking lady.

take care.

Presiden Barack Obama

while ironing my shirt for work just now i watched a discussion about barack obama because in a few hours or minutes he will become the first black president of usa. his inauguration is today-well its already 21 jan in Malaysia so kira yesterday malaysian time la-still 20 jan in usa right now.

personally, i think it does not matter who will be the us president because it will not change anything.

don't believe me? well, we'll see in a few years. maybe in a few month. the skin may be of a different colour but what's beneath it are pratically the same thing.

the apple doesn't fall far from the tree they say.

Orang Insurans Bagi

i received 5 diary from the insurans company. 5! 1 i already gave pakcik guard. so there are 4 more in my possession. donno what to do with it yet. maybe give to some friends. tenglok la macam mana.

calender? banyak siot!.. there are maybe lots more back at the storeroom. from islamic. spesis besar sket yang gantung kat dinding.

spesis letak atas meja i got a few.

i think i'm going to put all of it around the house. maybe inside the toilet pun letak. to remind me that time flies fast..

;-)

Kereta Kena Pecah Masuk

i got a call from my mom this morning, while i'm still sound asleep. hehe.. she told me their car was broken into this morning. maybe early morning. damn those thieves!

they stole the cd player, a bag containing my mom's telekong also gone. damn desperate thieves! and made a messed inside the car. not sure what other things that can be stolen. i think only the cd player was a stole-able thing but other than that there's nothing are of any value.

they broke one of the car window. kesian my parent. need to fork out over a hundred bucks to replace it.

those fucking thieves! pray all of you would hit a tree or masuk gaung and die! or drown and eaten by crocodile and die!

takde rezeki i told my mom. sabar je la.

Sepah!

what a mess! there seems to be a lot of work this week.

after 2 weeks of.. cuti.. kerja 2 hari.. cuti lg.. kerja sehari.. weekends.. or simply 10 not-working days in the space of 16 days. so naturally work will pilled up. damn!

still have holiday hangover.

yesterday went to bangi. almost. got briefing for something. but it rained at sri kembangan. took shelter at a restoren mamak just across the commuter station.

sms boss. told him i couldn't come. when the rain stopped i gerak khas pantas balik.

arrived at kepong. rained again. lagi lebat. took shelter, again, in front of maybank. took the opportunity to pay some bills. wait again. couldn't wait the rain to stop. so as soon as reda je, berdesup!.. balik.

clothes all wet. shiet man. nasib baik stokin dan yang inner wear tak basah.

yesterday call mom. talked to haris aka aish. talked gibberish. miss him. today called mom again. talked to haris aka aish again. gibberish all over again. still miss him.

Hidup Untuk Makan?

has anybody, at any one time or any other time, felt empty inside? you wake up one night and suddenly you felt that there was this emptiness in your life. i

t was like, what are your purpose of living right now? what do you live for? where are you going? or what you should be doing now? and the sad thing is, you can't answer all the questions because.. you don't have one.

that was what happened to me yesterday. after i reached home from work i'm so tired i fell asleep quite early around after 7pm and when i woke up around 3 hours later, suddenly, there was this feeling of emptiness.

i felt that i lack a purpose. i just can't quite express what i felt but more or less just like the questions i mentioned earlier.

the feeling followed me through the next wake-up and that was this morning. i barely sleep last night.

i hate that.

God, i really need something right now.. maybe something with a little purpose.

Hadirnya Seorang Insan Ke Dunia

it's official!.. shafy was born. yeeey!.. i'm so excited, happy, glad.. boy i'm reaally glad.. tears of joy i supposed.. ;-)

Alhamdulillah.. a healthy baby boy was born today. i'm not sure what time and the weight but i'm pretty sure about the date though. 2nd january. well, he is one day late of being a new year baby but hey, who cares! the most important thing was, he's ok, mommy's ok, then nothing else matters. (you will still get the present on time ok ;-)

i can't wait to meet the little guy. must be handsome ek.. i have only the best wishes for you. you want to know something shafy? you are one of the luckiest baby in the whole world. why? because you was born to the most wonderful mother i've ever met. a mother that would care for and love you with all her heart. so don't you ever let her down boy.. ever.

so, welcome to the world!

Bayi Tahun Baru?

a new year baby?

i'm not sure because the last news was that the baby hasn't come out yet. i'm all excited! a '1 january' baby! how often do we stumble upon or even knew anyone that was born on 1st january? second to NONE! well, he/she gets to celebrate his/her birthday the earliest every year. it's early in the month where it's easier to get present (because our salary has just been credited in our bank account for a week or so) and the best past is, it's a public holiday! well.. if he/she doesn't live or work in johor, kedah, kelantan, perlis or terengganu.. hehehe..

worried at the same time though. no news until now. worried sick. i hope the baby manage to see the light before midnight. :-) mommy, you can do it! i always pray for the safe delivery of her newborn sweatheart. i pray that everything would be just fine and i can't wait to see both of them. especially the little guy or gal.

is it going to be: shafy-yang suci, murni, bersih; or shafiyyah-bersih, jernih, murni. we'll find out soon.


damn i'm excited!

Lembaran Baru 2009

A New Year..

A New Start..
A New Chapter..
A New Beginning..

Forget The Bad..
Cherished The Good..

-Welcome 2009-

on the stroke of midnight today all of mankind around the world ushered a new beginning. welcome 2009. i believe most of us from all walks of life on earth more or less celebrate this special occasion. some organized a get-together bbq or new year party or doa selamat and some may just enjoying the colourful fireworks from ones home or office or at the roadside or whatever. amid the economic uncertainty forecasted this year, we ushered the new year with renewed hope that somehow there are some good left for us tuck somewhere.


not wanting to be left out alone at home celebrating with my fish, i managed to get a friend who, officially got his plan cancelled last night, and went out to celeberate. we went out around 11pm and the nearest place that had lots and lots of people was of course, the curve. so we rempit there as to avoid the traditionally well-known and very-hated situation called a-bad-ass traffic jam.

damn the turnout was huge! that place was jammed packed with human-but some look like a breed between human and hyenas or something. hmm.. i can hardly be sure. anyway, we walked through the joyus crowd just to sulk up the atmosphere for awhile. i may be forgiven for turning into a pervert that night because skins were everywhere! hehe.. after a while lingering around watching ravelers spraying foams and doing i don't know what, suddenly we heard something exploding in the sky and we knew 2009 has arrived. we were feasted with colourful firewok display with hundreds of people stands in awe, including farid and me, while i tried to take some picture of the colourful explosion with my worn-out hp. damn it's hard!


when the exploding stops we rempit again and went to uptown for some dvds. unluckily, only a ciput of dvd left because they were rushed the day before. so we make do what they have, bought two movies and went home. farid was sleeping over so i was not alone.

all in all, even if i didn't experienced the best celebration, i'm still thankful that somehow i did something and it's better than doing nothing right. :-)

while i was reading a paper today i came across an add from petronas. it really caught my eyes. it wrote:

"lembaran putih bersihmu bagaikan suatu undangan untuk menukilkan iltizam menempuh pelbagai cabaran masa hadapan, berpandukan ikhtibar zaman silam.

untuk menjalani hidup penuh bermakna sebagai satu bangsa dalam satu nusa.

agar kita mencapai cita, menjadi masyarakat yang lebih bijaksana, gagah dan bersatu padu.

dengan semangat yang jitu kita mampu mencorakkan 2009 dan tahun-tahun mendatang menjadi lebih gemilang untuk negara tercinta."

beautifully crafted words. very deep. i couldn't agree more. i really-really pray that this year would be much better than last year for me. a better person. happier than last year. well, wishing all of humanity good luck in everything and God bless all of you.

Melabuhkan Tirai 2008

"Selamat Tinggal 2008"

pejam celik pejam celik.. aik, today is the last day of 2008? wait *sambil gosok mata tengok calender kat henpon*.. yup, i think it is.

gosh! can you believe it? i repeat-today is the last day of 2008. it's like a blink of an eye and suddenly we are nearing the end. tomrrow is going to be a new year. a new beginning. whether we realise it or not a year has pass and most of us must be wondering what have we done or achieved or contribute or gain or whatever to whatever issues or target or objectives or goals that has been set or focused on or prioritised or.. something like that, this whole year. so the verdict? bad, very bad, worst, ok, good, very good, excellent? or maybe not so sure? it's in your hand. you decide.

so how about me? how does my life fare this year?

well.. truthfuly, this is the year that i really wouldn't want to remember. the year that i really want to forget. 2008 promises a new beginning, a new chapter. and indeed it was. but in a different kind of way and a different kind of twist. infact it was so twisted i became entangled in it. badly.

this is the year of mourning. i mourned a lot. i mean a lot! well i guess the effect you'll get when in shock. i mourned, i grief, i question a few things etc etc.. i'm getting mad aka crazy! :-) i could turn into the hulk. hehe.. luckily i managed to control my heartbeat thus preventing myself turning into a green-like monster. scary..

"Ada yang Hilang-Ipang"

i lost something this year. you might say "dude normal la tuh. everybody lost something somewhere. A lost his cat, B lost her earring, C got lost in the jungle and so on". i know but this year is especially stand out from the rest because the things i'd lost are the one that i cherish the most. that i loved the most. one of it was my scooter. i'm quite baffle myself as to why THIS year i lost quite a number or things that was dearest to me? one thing lead to another. coincidence or just plain bad luck only God knows. when you thought things were bad enough, it became very bad, then worst and then worst-er. God.. it totally drained you untill you were completly felt dejected an out of bound. i was walking on a very thin line of thread. there were no sunny days. the rain stop occasionally but the skies never opened up. it realy smacked you hard in the face.. or maybe the groin area.

at the same time i learned a lot this year. in work and in life. in work because i got a new job. in life because of the mourning-grieving-and-questioning thing. there were lessons learned. one thing that i learned was that we should never take things for granted. anything. friends, family, partners or even your enemy. i regreted a lot of things that i have ever did in my life. oh how i wish i could take it all back..

"Trying To find My Way-Lifehouse"

untill now i'm still searching on what is still left of me or for me. i'm still trying to find my way out. is it left or right? north or south? i'm not sure. haven't make up my mind yet. or maybe i'm not up to it yet.

"Seperti Yang Dulu-Ungu"

apa azam tahun depan?
who? me?

same as this year kot. none. hehe.. actually i have one but it didn't materialised. maybe i'll try again this year. so what do i hope for? well, i wish that 2009 will be at least for the better if not the best. i pray for the best. like everyone else i pray next year things would turn my way. i endured a lot this year so i really need it. i crave for it! i hope there is a silver lining somewhere for me.

last but not least, i would like to take this opportunity to wish all the people in this world a very Happy New Year 2009. may all of your dreams or what you had wish for comes true and i hope that next year will bring joy to all of you.

Amin.

Movie: Yes Man

today, well technically yesterday, suddenly out of nowhere din cikgu suddenly called me while i was still dreaming and told me he was on his way to fetch me. he was bored. understandable. so we went to watch a movie. Yes Man.

damn this movie was funny! undeniably one of the best movie so far this year. we were laughing our hearts out. so did the other moviegoers. i strongly recommended everybody to watch this funny shit. :-) sometime i just wish i could be like carl. but then not to say yes to EVERYTHING la. and also if i have the budget because most of if i think all comes down to money.

i'm considering watching it again. on second thought maaaaybe i'll just wait for the pirated copy. hehe.. save bajet..

Tahlil Arwah & Doa Selamat

last saturday ajak and i went to a tahlil arwah & doa selamat at farid's house. the doa selamat was for their new home and for his pregnant sister. after reciting the Yasin they served us lunch. it was a lovely house. and the food was delicious. then i sent ajak to pudu to catch his 'double decker' bus to jb. he was away for a long leave. he said he'll be back on new year day. here i go again. home alone.

lunch time: the front view of farid dol's house

hungry horse: nyesal aku amik sikit.. nak tapau ar balik ni.. sedap soit..

Selamat Hari Natal

all christians around the world celebrated christmas last thursday. so most of the shopping complexes decorated their premises with colourful and beautiful decoration. especially at the centre court where the creative minds offer its best. i managed to walk around a few shopping complexes and i was mesmerized.

1 Utama

The Curve

Renjis-Renjis Dipilis

di renjis renjis dipilis
ditepungilah tawar...
hai beras kunyit ditabur..
disiram si air mawar...

duduk dua sejoli...
diatas pelamin berseri...
dihias intan baiduri...
sebagai raja sehari..

limau purut serumpun...
dipilin mata suasa...
sepuluh jari disusun
berderai si air mata...

lenggang lenggok bergaya...
langkah segak tersusun..
andai tersasul bicara..
ampun dan maaf ku pohon

di renjis renjis dipilis
ditepungilah tawar...
hai beras kunyit ditabur..
disiram si air mawar...

.: best wishes from us :.
farid, man, wan, kok, anis, sha, hidayah, pak rem, imran, ijad, nana & foodline promoters

Selamat Pengantin Baru - Ayie & Mila

Selamat Pengantin Baru

Ayie & Mila
21 December 2008

last saturday, one of the most lovely couple i've met finally tied the knot after more than a year of loving and caring for each other. gold was the theme and both of them look marvelous and sweet. its a simple wedding but nevertheless everything was in good hands.

king & queen: "beta istiharkan esok cuti umum. khadaaaaamm!!.."

the akad nikah was done at a mosque near the bride's home but unfortunately we couldn't attend the ceremony because it was held early in the morning at around 9am while at the same time we were just on our way.

security guard: wei.. puting aku nampak tak..
king: ko diam la. pas ni ko kontrol trafik kat depan umah pak mentua aku..

i went there with a few of my friends. the 7 of us departed from our check point at kepong driving 2 cars around 930am and the journey took us around less than 2 hours. we believe (or at least farid believe) it should take us about 1 and a half hours. but UNfortunately it took us little bit more longer because we overshot the junction of a road leading to the bride's house. anyway, we finally arrived and what a lovely village it was. we were surrounded with padi field. sejauh mata memandang. i think this place could be used for therapy for trouble city folks because it really can give you a peace of mind. lovely.

two kings?: tall king & short king + 1 busybody-guard

as soon as we arrived there were already a lot of guest. its nearly noon and some of us were in need of food! so without further a due the hungry people went straight directly to the reception area and dive ourselves to the food served. lapor beb.. farid and sha were the pengapit so they went to the respective rooms to be groomed. the others? melantak la.. hehehe..

v.i.p:whei lhapa wei..
king: kho saba leh tak. akhu sekshe phakai bajhu nih..
cameraman: smiiileee...!!

even some of our promoters came. they were excited to come to this wedding because it was their 1st time attending a malay wedding reception. yup, all were chinese lenloi hehe.. they applied leave just to go to the wedding even though they were supposed to work because it was saturday and because christmas was around the corner and because they were short on target and so on so forth.

walk of fame: ha.. cepat cepat.. makcik ade apoimen ni.. yang cun belah kanan, yg huduh kiri..

when nearly all the guest had gone home, a few hampeh people just arrived and definitely late! lucky the food was still abundant. so they still got to eat. farid couldn't stand the sight of 1 roasted chicken all this while since they met at the pengantin's eating table and because this chicken was flirting with him. so while the kings and queens were busy entertaining guests, he made a pact with me to kidnap the chicken. i gave him some tips and he actualy kidnap this chicken! and what he did to this little chicken was sad and inhumane. ganas! nafsu serakah tol.

while farid harassing the chicken all of us were enjoying ourselves. chit chat-ting teasing making fun of some innocent couple(sorry ijad. can't help it. hehe..) and etc. finally, around maybe 4pm we were ready to go back to kl. after wishing the couple all the best we head our way back to traffic jams and polluted air. i have a lot of pic to upload but for the time being we'll make do with what i took with my hp.

well, last but not least, i wish both of my newly wed friend the very best of wishes a friend could wish for. i'm happy for you and i hope things would only be the better. the road will never be smooth but i'm sure both of you will do just fine. all you need is just a little bit of.. love. that's all.

congratulation guys!

Kita Hanya Merancang

planning is good. that's why people plan. but sometimes it doesn't happened the way it supposed to be. yesterday i plan a few thing to do today. but i managed only 1 thing. not even half.

today is suppose to be a good day right? well at least i want it to be. but it doesn't turn out that way. i mean, today is my birthday right? so things should be at leeeeeast normal right?.. wrong!! it doesn't always go that way.

frustrated? a little bit.. really?.. nah.. actually a lot bit! a HUGE bit!!!

can i curse?.. can i? can i?.. erm, to whom? mybe to myself?.. err, why not? ok.. D**N YOU!! S****D L****R F*****G I***T!!!!

i'm all f*cked up.. time flies and i'm really f*cked up.. :'(

Selamat Hari Jadi

hepi besday to me!..
hepi besday to me!..
hepi besday to meeeeeee!..
hepi besday tooo.. meeeee!..

today is my birthday. after the stroke of midnight, i sang myself a birthday song just now. just to cheer me up a little.

well, there's no birthday card for me this year for sure. let alone a present. its ok i think. one would probably ask is what is my wish this time around? whao.. the list go on and on. that i can tell you. i have soooooo many wishes.

but the 1 wish that i badly needed, that stands out from lots of other wishes is just simply, happiness. that is what i want the most. happy in life. no doubt money plays an important part in life nowadays. but even if you have all the money in the world, if you are not happy then life would be meaningless. agree? most people will. i can't expect to be smiling or laughing all the time. i know there must be up and down somewhere along the road. but if at the end of the day i can still manage to smile with my loved ones by my side, then i'll be happy.

how time has no mercy eh. it doesn't care who or what you are. suddenly i'm nearing half of my life already (if i divided the everage of malaysian male life span, i think). and what do i have to show the world (at least my world).. frankly, close to nothing.

underachiever?.. maybe.. or probably i am.

i remembered not so long ago when someone so dear threw a suprise birthday celebration at a mamak restaurant. together with a few close friends they bought me an expensive birthday cake (which i don't mind) and they sang the birthday song. infront of all the people! you guess it, i was surprised la ofcourse and humiliated.. hahaha!.. balas dendam la konon because we did this humiliation thing to 1 of my friend (also present that night) at wangsa maju. that night i was.. happy. so happy.. and that was a beautiful and sweet life back then. wish that i could taste it again. pray to God always.

yesterday was pakcik awaludin's birthday. he is 56th years old and just retired last friday. i wish him all the best and welcome to my father's club. both of them are retiree now..

so happy birthday to both of us. today i'm going to enjoy or pampered myself a little bit. maybe i'll buy myself a birthday cake (i mean a slice of cake) eat something delicious or watch a movie or buy something good. things that i haven't indulge in for a long time now. i need a little break. maybe i'll do it alone but it doesn't mean i couldn't enjoy it right. hope so.

well, happy birthday to me again. semoga umur aku panjang dan murah rezeki aku. Amin.

Pengorbanan

Aidiladha is also known as hari raya korban, commemorates the sacrifices made by the Prophet Ibrahim (hence the word 'korban,' which means sacrifice in Arabic).

i believe everyone must have done some kind of sacrifices in their lives. parents, children, spouse, fiancee, boyfriend, girlfriend, friends or whoever they are for different reasons. some are huge sacrifices and some are small sacrifices.

as for me, i also did some sacrifices here and there. small ones big ones. when my life took a turn, i just know that i have to make the biggest sacrifice of all.

and that is my life.

not that i want to kill myself or end it in any other way. what i want or what i need lies second now. it's not important what i want. all just seem to distant right know. maybe i'm still searching for the light at the end of the tunnel. life seems so hard.

for now on family is priority no.1. what ever i do or want to do, i will do it for my family. they have sacrificed a lot for me. a lot. love, money, support, everything. i owe them so much. my sister sacrifice so much for my parent. the thing is, i still couldn't afford to help her. and this has make me sad. very very sad.

every time when i pray, i prayed that i have enough capacity in terms of everything especially on the financial front, to help them ease at least some of the burden. it really kills me when i felt that i have done little so far. i want to contribute more. maybe i need to do more sacrifices. i just need a breakthrough. maybe a miracle.

i felt sorry for myself. pity. someone said to me all i can do right now is be patience and someday all things would turn out for the best. do i have a choice? maybe that is all i have left. patience.